


I want it, I need it (I wanted to believe it)

by isloremipsumafterall



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: F/F, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, there's a happy ending i swear
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-05-18 06:56:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14847917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isloremipsumafterall/pseuds/isloremipsumafterall
Summary: It’s not like she wants to but this will save them both from the pain. Or it will save Sara from it because she can move on and find her soulmate and Ava will eventually die regretting the day she was created. (Not born, never born)





	I want it, I need it (I wanted to believe it)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [plinys](https://archiveofourown.org/users/plinys/gifts).



When Ava was kid – thought she was a kid – all she had wanted was an answer as to why she didn’t bear a soulmate mark the same way other people did. Her parents – fake, like the rest of her life – had assured her it meant nothing.

 

In reality it turned out it was because she meant nothing. Just another clone in a long line of them ripped from the future by Rip Hunter to serve the Time Bureau.

 

She almost wants to faint again.

 

“Uh, Director Sharpe?”  Gary stumbles on his words like he always does and Ava wonders how many times her twelve predecessors had to deal with it. How they met their ends. Did they look at their blank wrist with regrets too?

 

“What is it Gary?” Ava sighs, standing up and tugging her jacket down just a little so it looks perfect – so she looks perfect, just as designed.

 

“Er, Miss Lance is calling.” He pauses. “Again.”

 

That at least makes Ava smile before she falters just a little. She and Sara had left on good terms with the defeat of Mallus; in love and thinking there could be a future for them together.

 

And then the band that Sara wore over her wrist slipped a little, a soulmate mark clear as day.

 

Not Ava’s. Not ever for Ava.

 

“Tell her I’m busy.” Ava’s shoulders slump just a little, not enough for Gary to tell her turmoil just enough to make her feel a little more defective.

 

“Tell her yourself.” A voice calls out from the doorway, cool as ice and Ava looks up to Sara standing there, looking angry as ever.

 

“I’ll just…” Gary motions for the door and flees and Ava’s betting he’s going to hide out at Constantine’s for the next few hours.

 

“Sara.” Ava breathes out her name in both relief and exhaustion.

 

“Ava.” Sara intones, tilting her head just a little. “You’ve been avoiding me.”

 

“It’s not-” She stumbles on her words because what can she say. It’s not like she wants to but this will save them both from the pain. Or it will save Sara from it because she can move on and find her soulmate and Ava will eventually die regretting the day she was created. (Not born, never born)

 

“Not…” Sara draws the word out as she steps closer and in to Ava’s space. “What’s going on?” Her lips are pressed together in a fine line and Ava wants to reach up to stroke her cheek and assure her every thing’s fine so she can take away the worry in Sara’s eyes.

 

“Did you ever meet your soulmate?” She asks instead, it comes out mercifully steady despite how shaky she feels.

 

Sara’s brow furrows in response and then amazingly enough she grins and throws her head back with a laugh.

 

“So that’s a no.” Ava says drily, unable to stop the sarcastic defences she has. (Were those built in her too?)

 

“I’m sorry.” Sara says but it doesn’t sound like she really means it since she’s still grinning. “Is that what’s been bothering you?”

 

Ava shifts on her feet and crosses her arms to stall for answering but Sara takes her silence as the answer anyway and leans in to rest her forehead against Ava’s.

 

“Yes.” Sara says quietly, “I did. And then I died.”

 

Unbidden Ava’s hand comes up to Sara’s hip, slipping under the edge of her shirt to stroke at her hip because she knows how many nightmares come from Sara’s death.

 

“Nyssa’s mark faded.” Sara continues, “My mark stayed.” Her lips quivered a little as she tried to smile, “Guess the dead don’t lose theirs.”

 

“You’re not dead Sara.” Ava replies back just as softly as Sara spoke, switching her arm to grasp Sara’s wrist and feeling the pulse under her fingers.

 

“And you’re not just a clone.” Sara shot back.

 

Ava scowls because yes, as a matter of fact, she _is_ just a clone. One who was programmed to think she wasn’t mind you but one all the same. Replaceable and soulmate-less.

 

“Not to me.” Sara must see the bite in her face and soothes her, “Not to anyone. Ava, I…” She swallows hard and leans in so her lips are just about touching Ava’s. “I don’t want to lose you. You, Ava Sharpe, Director Sharpe, who snores when she sleeps.”

 

“I do not.” Ava denies quickly.

 

Sara snorts, “Uh yeah, you kinda do. It’s cute.” She assures Ava and kisses her finally. When she pulls back her smile is soft, “My point is we’re kinda in the same boat. We can be soulmate lost together.”

 

Soulmates together is what Ava hears and judging by the mischievous look in Sara’s eyes that was her plan.

 

“I guess I did learn to ride a horse for you.” Ava says, pretending it’s grudgingly, “I could figure this out too.”

 

“Atta girl.” Sara’s grin is wide and free, “What else do you wanna ride?”

 

Ava can’t contain her laughter when Sara wiggles her eyebrows just a little. “I can’t believe I think you’re charming.”

 

When Sara pouts she leans in this time to kiss her and it’s dangerous doing it in her office where anyone – Gary – can walk in.

 

“We’re good now?” Sara asks and while it might sound like there’s a carelessness in her voice Ava can tell by the way it shakes just a fraction she’s trying to get some assurance herself.

 

“We’re good.” Ava promises and for the first time in her memory  - real or planted – her bare wrist isn’t bothering her.

 

“Great cause it’s not like Ava’s grow on trees.” Sara’s eyes are sparkling again.

 

“You’re going to start with clone jokes now aren’t you?” Ava says, deadpan and rolls her eyes.

 

“You’re still one of a kind to me babe.” Sara claps her on the shoulder and winks and just like that Ava melts a little.

 

“Go destroy the timestream.” Ava kisses her one last time before pushing Sara away lightly.

 

“Don’t you mean save it?”

 

“I said what I said.” Ava replies, smirking at the annoyed look on Sara’s face and then she’s gone, slipping through the time portal and back on the Waverider.

 

Her office feels emptier without Sara but if Sara had stayed she never would have gotten her work done. A tempting offer but Ava likes her work, whether that’s how she was made or not. Sara seems to like her either way.


End file.
